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DEDICATION

This devotional book is dedicated to all Christians ,i pray and i hope by sharing some of my journey you will also find encourage in your situations and in the Lord .as you dedicate prayers in your situations ,keep your faith up, keep your head up, keep your confidence up, keep your trust in him I tell you my fathers ,mothers , brothers and sisters in Christ that he knows what he is doing it may seem as if he doesn’t but he does the best decision you can do for yourself is to hold on till the finishing so that you see that everything that happened was intentional he was not making it up at all.

In my Journey the Lord dealt with me personally in silent he did not show the world .i could wake up put my makeup on and my smile on and no one could see and know what I was going through .i watched a lot of people complimenting me saying how smart and happy I look and I always say to myself if only you knew what am g,oing through right now you wouldn’t like to be me . a lot of people didn't know what was going on in my life yet i was broken , yet I was losing my mind, yet I was limping Glory to him for his ways he allows things to happen so that at the end we find our true self and at end his Glory will be revealed .

A friend once said to me the way you look outside reflects how you feel inside I laughed because I knew nothing about that yes I looked good outside but inside I was in tears, i know as you reading some of you can relate but i want to hold on and keep your faith whatever is going on is for your own good crazy as that sounds but yes it is . If you can endure you will find out at the end , in the meantime be encouraged in prayer and reading of the word because it is through those tools that we can remain calm even in our situation’s, we can find the help we need, we can overcome the situations that we are in , it has worked for me therefore I' encouraging you please don’t give up ,one thing that made me to hold on was that I wanted to know what was going to happen after all I was going through I was so curious to see and now I encourage you to be curious in him for he knows best .i remember how the Prophetess of God Mrs Matwa said to me when we were talking about my struggles she said i qoute Praise God because he is building a boom in you ,you will see the tranformation i looked at her and my thoughts were saying -you must be loosing your mind for saying that because nothing felt like i was being built up at all .it was just a mess i didnt even know how to handle i think what made to survive everything is through the help of God because how i was dealing with pain was amazing i could be in pain and stress but to a person who see me he or she will never see that am in pain because am too relaxed not because i wanted to but it was my way of dealing with things because i dont think it would have helped to be allover the place crying to everyone i meet .

The struggles i faced in my life drove me away from seeking advice from a lot of people to seeking the advice of the Holy spirit I had nothing against the people I was seeking advice from but I got to a stage where I wanted the Lord to talk to me and me learning to hear his voice because sometimes we go to the Pastors and our elders and still not be real with them I got tired of not being real I said to myself Lord you know it all you know the things am not saying , you know the things am going to do in advance then whose the best person to talk to if it's not you because with you even if I want to there’s no way I can lie . i looked in my life and I thought to myself girl you are saved yet you are sinking, God had to do what I call a spring cleaning I was calling myself saved yet I was not behaving like a saved person , why do I say this was because there were no fruits to show for it when i talk about fruit i dont mean material things no i mean because i was go through a lot i find it hard to pray and reading of the word in such a way i didn't know what was going on anymore,i was so empty in terms of knowing the word ,my language was not of a saved person ,i was entertaining people who i didnt even know why am entertaining ,I still had peers who were are not saved and when am with them I had to compromise myself, finding myself to conversations that are not Godly at first I was lying to myself that it doesn’t matter who I hang with and who I chat with on my phone as long as am saved ,as long am safe with God atleast that’s what I thought : that I was right with him when he revealed that I was not I was so convicted I said now Lord process me take away what's not of you in my life and replace it with the word .they way i was so wounded i need God to help me claim my position back in the Kingdom ,the enemy always bring confusions in our lives because he knows what the Lord is about to do in our lives do yourself a favour dont move even if things gets worse.

Sometimes we have this tendency of thinking we can fool God all my life as a saved person I use to think I can manipulate God with words I don’t know how many times I'd pray to God telling him I have learnt and am ready while I know nothing sometimes when you are in pain you pray crazy prayers because we do not want to be processed and am one of those who don’t take pain very well but my situations have shown me that am stronger than i think , all along I have been praying for destination while he was working on me , i love God because even thou i was praying those crazy prayers he didn't listen to them he continued processing me to make sure his purposes about my life comes through.which is to help me discover the things i didnt know about myself ,is in it funny how you get to discover the real you through the struggles of your life ?i dont know why is that but God always uses the storms,trial and the struggle to help us give birth to our true-self ,where we get to discover what we are cabable of ,things we never knew we could do and be , i discovered all that and more through my breaking.

During the process I had to learn the hard way ,I had to do without things that I wanted ,I had to walk in faith trusting that whenever I needed something he will make it available for me you have no idea how that was .i remember there was a day when I had to go Kumnkani FM(local Radio station) I had no money in me and all i had was someone who was suppose to pay for services rendered,I prayed to God so that they pay me in the morning that day but at twelve o’clock still there was no payment I panicked and I walked to the road I said these words God you are in control now be in control I stood there after few minutes a white woman stopped the car and asked where am i going she gave me a lift and on top of that she gave me 50 rand i said now Lord these are extrems a white woman doing all this for me and the spirit said to me watch me i will show the Church and he said the people who used to be your freinds ended up talking about you but now i will give you people who will help you by providing what you need and live you without you telling them about your struggles i dont know how God does it but that to me was the Highlight to everything .and i remember again there was a time where i needed to be in a meeting in Southernwood from Amalinda where i used to stay again this day i had no money and the time of the meeting was approached so i decided to put my make up on and be ready for the road and when i reached the road i stopped the car told the driver i dont have money but i need to be in Southernwood the driver looked at me and he said beatiful as you are but you dont have someone to give you money i was so emotional i couldnt even respond i just smiled when i got to my meeting i couldnt help myself i was too emotional i broke down and cry now the meeting was about me i couldnt take it anymore i was tired of needing ,i was tired of enduring as i was crying the lady who i was suppose to have a meeting with me prayed for me instead of having a meeting we spoke about my situations she encouraged me i picked up myself and i went out as i was walking out a thought in my mind came that i dont have money to go back and with me i had a laptop i took that laptop i went to sell it for 100 rands you can imagine how i felt but because i needed the money i had to sell it ,holding that money felt like i was holding a thousand rand with me thats how great it felt when i held it ,i bought something to eat and i went home,to many things God did in my breaking I was always so uncomfortable to not to have and to ask but I realized later on that he was training me how to hear, how to trust him and how to walk by faith .i didn’t like this at all but today I say am glad I went through what I went through because I wouldn’t have found the things I found if it was not for the steps I went through.All am trying to say brethren's is that God knows what he is doing in our lives we just need to trust him and to rely on him. even as things keep on going wrong in our eyes ,things happened in my life but i learnt that God is a God of order and excellent and lastly God says regardless he want us to know that he is on our side and he wants us to know in him we can win so go ahead repeat that to yourself in him I WILL WIN. i know you might be asking yourself how do i say all this after all happened and you just had a half of a quarter to things that happened in my life but through it all i saw him move in my behalf that is why i can be able to say and to know that he is on our side no matter what.

Writing this book was after I realized that am not alone there’s a lot of Christians who are saved but yet are sinking in terms of not knowing how to pray when we are in situations but no one is talking about these things because one one wants to sound as if they are not holy enough but the truth is if Christians do not know how to pray when they are in situations the Kingdom of God will sink .again as a Christian I have learnt that the reason why we cannot grow and we cannot bear fruits as Christian’s is because we do not know what we are suppose to do after accepting Christ because it is not just about accepting him but it is the knowing what we have inside us and moving with it so that we are indeed changed for better but we cant get to this stage because we dont even realise the power of accepting christ in our lives hence we still see Christian’s who are broke, depressed, sick, not married ,failed marriages ,while God in his word says i have come to give you life not just life but life abundantly (see John10:10), but in all this i believe God now is doing something ,he is raising up people who will help the people of Kingdom to arise and i know i want to be part of that . i know that in some cases God allowed things to happen for me to be tested,to be molded,to be changed thats what happened in my life i was not sinking because i was disobyeing him sometimes it was difficult for me to hear what he wants me to do because my mind and my focus was on my situations and that made me not to be active in his word and prayer they way i was suppose to be .and that part take me back to the story of Job God allowed the enemy to test Job because at end he knew that he can restore him back sometimes that what he does in our lives his intentions is not to kill us .

May the Lord fill you with so much joy and hope as you start your journey in correcting your mistakes , praying in your situations , staying focus and dedicated even as you face trails .God bless you all may you receive more than you ask for Amen.

PURPOSE

Before I started with these prayers it was difficult for me to open a bible ,I would open a bible browse through it and become bored but after i had dedicating my room to him he started saying things to me and i started seeing a difference in my spiritual life . deciding to publish my prayers was not part of my plan ,I only wanted to be a prayer warrior so I was willing to do anything to stay in prayer even if it means writing my prayers down and pasting them over my room, If you want to start seeing change over your life start doing the same thing, yes the devil will discourage you making you believe the Lord does not see what you are doing but am telling you continue even if you are discourage knowing that no matter what he is for you, remain in him never move your eyes from him, maybe you will ask yourself how do you not move your eyes away from him when things keep on happening in your life ,well I will talk about me things happened that discouraged me not to continue with the prayers where it seemed as if things were getting worse the more I pray but because I knew what he has done for me already(the power of having experience) I endured trusting that he knows and sees it all .sometimes we need to use our experience and testimonies to fight the devil .now my prayers changed from praying :God, please bless me with this and that(because now I know that whatever I want God has already given me in spirit its just me realizing that and claiming what belongs to me ) to God thank you for what just happened ,thank you for the context that you are giving me ,I want more .now my mind had an understanding that the more something that seems bad happens the more am blessed .so every time it happened I would rejoice in him knowing that nothing just happen and everything at the end will work out .

Sometimes when we are going through situations we become so weak but i want you to Know this your strength is perfected in the weaknesses of life, just hold on things will turn around for you, never allow the devil to own your thoughts and mind always renew yourself in prayer and reading of the Word (see Romans 12:2), do it even if you don’t feel like doing it. When you are in process of brokenness sometimes it's even difficult to read a bible you so concentrating on what’s happening and your mind is all over that you can't even do anything else, I don’t know about you my fellow Christians but am talking about myself here, you loose yourself you find yourself praying prayers that are so strange that please Lord take this away I do not need it but because he is intentional he continues anyway because him alone knows what's best for us all . Let's praise him causewe serve a wonderful God.

The purpose of publishing these prayers and the things i have learnt is because God wants to help us in our situations –it is time and he wants you to be close to him as you are struggling because it through the closeness with him that you will be able to move , he wants you to stop relying on people of this world but to rely on him once you have figured out that you will see the transformation over your life and God says even thou you are facing struggles right now he wants you to know that he sees you continue trusting him and at the end he will reveal himself to you.

When you are about to start dedicating your prayers remember its better to write ,paste them where you can see so that everyday you are reminded of your prayer points remember sometimes when you are in storms you wont have much motivation but i tell you once you start writing your prayers and pasting them you will see yourself motivated to pray more

God wants this for all of us ,he wants us to realize that he is not your enemy he loves you regardless of what he is a father , mother, a friend, comforter and everything you need .he is waiting for you and me to fully give ourselves to him and he will do the rest just surrender .

INTRODUCTION

To the bad and good things that I learnt i n my journey is that God is the source of everything and he allows things to happen over our lives not because he does not care but because he loves us too much and that he does not give big fights to little soldiers even in his word he says he will never give you what you can’t handle(1 Corithians10:13), there was a time when I thought I will not make it but through it all God kept his promise and I came to understand that all the things I went through was for my good .T.D Jakes talks about this topic in one of his sermons ‘Good hurts ‘he calls all his sufferings Good Hurts because they helped him grow and strong even thou at that time when they happened he could not think so but now seeing what God has done over his life he knows that it was for his own good I can also relate to that I carried a lot of pain and suffering but am beginning to see his glory for all my sufferings.

One night I was watching a movie WAR ROOM I was so motivated by this movie especially the part where the woman removed her closet so that she can have a place where she will be praying and spending time with God I wanted to take charge of my life and have that war room, of course, I didn’t have a big house like her I had a flat where I was sharing with someone and I decided from that night I will make my bedroom my war room and in my wall I will start pasting my prayers and dedicate a prayer in each every area of my life , every stronghold in my life , I could not sleep that night writting prayers over my life and I prayed telling God from now on this is not just a room that I will sleep into but it will be a room where I fight in prayer I was so tired of the enemies lies I wanted to have a prayerful life I realize that from that day that most of my time I spent it in things that don’t matter instead of spending time in God and prayer and I say everyday I want to see his glory how then are we suppose to understand his ways if we are not in him the first week went well I was so excited to be spending time with God like that nothing mattered even my favorite soaps didn’t matter. Every chance I get I would write down my prayers and paste them and every morning before I do anything I'd stand in front of my door saying the prayers I kept on doing that but as I was praying I got discourage am sharing this part because as you start your journey the enemy will try and discourage you making you believe that God is not listening .one night as I was crying praying to God to hear me and show me a way .the voice inside me said to me don’t worry continue with your prayers I am listening my heart was filled with so much hope ,but as i continued things started to turn up side down I didn’t have money to rent ,so i lost the same room i was using for praying and I was thinking to myself how is this possible how can this happen now as am in the journey of seriously praying but I endured because I wanted to know what was going to happen after all that. God started doing things he started removing people who I thought I relied on,people who use to bail me up when am need this really hurt my feelings because I felt this was wrong, how can I be losing the same people who i felt God gave it me to help me in my journey then he said to me I gave you them for a short time now am removing them because you are entering another season and this season I need your fully ears I will give you new friends when you need them and i will keep the freinds you need for where you are going and i thought to myself he must really needed my full ears to do all this? but i asked myself how do i listen in this state? but I tell you when God has called you for bigger things strange things happen and I have learnt that when that happens our role is to be still and watch him move .as his word says the steps of a Good man are ordered by the Lord(psalms 37:23) .as I was still learning to be still I became so desperate for money that now I started selling my furniture for cash flow.everything became a mess when I wanted to sell some of my furniture strangely everything got broken and no one wanted to buy,i remember i sat down by Spar asking God what is he trying to do -to kill me ?but God doesnt respond to questions like that ,he doesnt even respond much when you are instruggles what you feel is a strange peace just as a proof that he is there ,id ask myself everytime why is it difficult to hear God in our strugles and i learnt that we cant hear when we are in pain that is why he always gives us peace that we cant even explain and understand .

My problems got worse i didnt have any income to rent the flat everything was just becoming more messy I didn’t understand a thing it was even worse when my furniture got broken ,so I thought to myself let me go home and I need to relax and reflect on things otherwise I don’t know what’s happening anymore but all this time am continuing to write and praying and one day it hitted me that the reason why this is happening is because now am claiming my life back,now am claiming my position in the Kingdom the enemy did all he could so that he can stop me from praying and taking seriously the things of the Lord as he did all my life he tried to kill me so that i dont dicover who i was and who God is but God was with me all the steps encouraging me to continue sometimes its difficult to continue praying especailly when you dont see results but because the devil was creating the confusion i knew that i am now disturbing him by my prayers so this means as you continue claiming your life back know that things will happen but push forward and know that they are only happening because now you are steping in the devils toes and he doesnt like it ,it has nothing to do with the fact that the Lord doesnt not see you.he sees you and at the end he will answer your prayers

As i was blindly trusting God things started to be changing i got a place to stay with no rental fee and everything was provided for , i couldn't believe that God could do that (to get a place like the place where am staying right now and yet am no paying anything even food ) i moved from worrying about rent to not worrying about anything everything was provided for me that's how God is ,the devil made me feel that he was not going to answer while God was busy preparing big things for me.

So as i continued with my prayers a lot of questions come to mind i had to sit ,reflect and remind myself of certain things like why am i saved ?what is the word saying about it? What is prayer and how should i be praying ?the importance of speaking positive even if you are going through situations, learning how to command what you want even if feels like things will not happen,what is Faith and how can i use it to win ,what causes delay in our prayer,why does it seem as if people who are unbelievers seem to be prosperous than us who are saved while we declare him to be a God that provides when i realised that i didnt know much i had to start from stretch .The Lord said to me now that you are realising all this , start by renewing your vows to me so that you can remember that i was always with you all this time ,so i did it and as i continued i asked him to reveal to me what were the mistakes that needed to be corrected for me to grow, to succeed, to be fully living the life that i was intended for and he started processing me now am sharing my journey with you because i want you to be encouraged in him even in your situations and to know that God is bigger even beyond our situations he can change any situation within a blink of an eye just continue focusing on him and you will be rewarded at the end.

I want you to remember that in whatever you are going through right now the Lord has won the victory already the enemy will try and confusing you making you believe that it is over but remember this in that midst of a broken heart hold on to him ,in that midst of a struggle hold on to him ,in that midst of confusion hold on to him ,in that midst of people you trusted spreading lies about you hold on, in that midst of that betrayal hold on ,in that midst of that Doctors report hold on ,in that midst of temptation’s hold on, in that midst of you not having a place to stay hold on, in that midst of losing that job hold on, in that midst of you having a place but no rental and the month is approaching hold on, in that midst of your bank is at the minus and the bank is sending you messages to close it hold on ,in that midst of that time where you feel you have done all you could hold on ,in that midst of you having no food to eat hold on to him ,in whatever you are going through just hold on till the finishing

God says in his word that my people perish because of lack of knowledge and we die when we do not know his word , this is true and my question is if we do not know the word how are we going to fight the devil?remember we are soldiers and we fight him by what the word says about us remember how the devil was trying to tempt Jesus Christ he said nothing but the word and the enemy flee away from him (see Mathew 4:1-11)even in our situations we can't fight with our own power and lastly remember the battle you are in is not yours but the Lords do not make a mistake of getting in ring with the enemy just throw scriptures at him everytime he tries to confuse you and he will flee away

Remember what he says in his word

What other nation is so great as to have their gods near them the way God is near us whenever we pray to him? Deuteronomy 4:7 .

My Prayer now dedicate yours

I have come that you may have life -life in all its fullness(see John 10:10)

TABLE OF CONTENT

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

DEDICATION

PURPOSE

INTRODUCTION